spigot: WHY ARE WE ALL HANDCUFFED TO THE TRAIN TRACKS atandt: MY INVITATION SAYS THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A PICNIC

spigot: WE'VE CONTRIBUTED ENOUGH CONTENT TO SOCIETY AND MADE A REAL DIFFERENCE THAT WE NEVER HAVE TO PAY FOR MOVIES AGAIN pants: WE BOUGHT ENOUGH $18.99 CDS FROM TOWER, WE'RE GOOD

spigot: DID I HEAR YOU RIGHT / DID I HEAR YOU SAYIN spigot: THAT YOU'RE GONNA MAKE A COPY OF A GAME WITHOUT PAYIN

deuce: LOUIS GOSSETT JR WAS POSITIVELY GLOWING IN ANY AND ALL OF THE IRON EAGLE SERIES

effigy: [TURNING OFF TV] effigy: ......SHOOTING IRON GOLEMS FROM MY PORCH

spigot: CALLING A DETECTIVE 'IRONSIDE' BECAUSE HE'S IN A WHEELCHAIR IS LIKE CALLING ME PENIS PUMP spigot: MAYBE INSTEAD OF A WHEELCHAIR THE GUY HAS A PENIS PUMP AND HE GETS TO SQUEEZE IT ALL DAY IN COURTS OF LAW spigot: DURING CROSS-EXAMINATION WE CUT TO THE JURY BUT WE CAN STILL HEAR SQUEAKS AND PUMPS AND VARIOUS RELEASES OF AIR PRESSURE spigot: THERE'S A GODDAMN WRITERS STRIKE

spigot: WELL spigot: I spigot: FINALLY FIGURED OUT HOW TO TESELLATE AN IRREGULAR NURBS SURFACE AND MY REWARD IS A BIG LONG BEAT OFF SO I'LL BE AFK I GUESS deuce: CAN GOD REALLY PUT ME IN JAIL

deuce: PROVING ONCE AND FOR ALL THAT WE'RE IRREVERSIBLY RETARDED, I GUESS pants: WE SHOULD PISS TOGETHER AND YOU SHOULD BE SITTING AND PUSHING YOUR DICK BETWEEN YOUR LEGS LIKE A WOMEN AND I'LL AIM THE PISS BETWEEN YOUR LEGS deuce: THAT'S NOT

pants: NEED JACKOFF PERMIT pants: I HAVE CASH

pants: FASTER-THAN-LIGHT TRAVEL pants: IS IT POSSIBLE pants: WAS RE: GAY RICKSHAWS

spigot: IS IT TRUE BART SIMPSON SAT ON A BUTTERFINGER AND THAT'S WHY HE'S LIKE THAT deuce: LIKE WHAT spigot: LIKE SO AWESOME

net: T DEUCE IS IT TRUE THAT YOU ONLY HURT THE ONES YOU LOVE deuce: T NET NO IT IS NOT deuce: T NET BUT THEY GET EXTRA ATTENTION

spigot: IS IT TRUE WHAT THEY SAY spigot: ABOUT US GETTING GAY spigot: IN THE STALLS / IN THE STALLS / IN THE STALLS pants: IN / THE / STALLS spigot: YOU AND ME STANDING HERE / AND IT'S TIME TO BE QUEER spigot: LINE pants: MAKING CHRISTMAS / MAKING CHRISTMAS spigot: I ALREADY SAID QUEER spigot: CURTAIN FOR GOD SAKES

pants: IS IT TRUE YOU CAN TRAIN CROWS TO LICK DICK deuce: SORT OF pants: PERHAPS THE DICK OF A MAN SUCH AS MYSELF deuce: THEY BITE THEM MORE THAN ANYTHING pants: WHAT ABOUT PECKING

deuce: IS IT TYPICAL FOR DENTISTS TO "DIAGNOSE" YOU AS "GAY"

pants: I WAS RAISED ON LOVIN' JESUS GOIN' TO CHURCH AND SUNDAY SCHOOL pants: IS KOJAK THERE pants: DUE TO TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES WE HAVE MOMENTARILY STOPPED ALL BOBSLEDS

deuce: T SPIGOT GAPE LOVERS NO. 6 SCENE 1

spigot: NOT ON OR BESIDE OR AROUND OR NEXT TO OR UNDERNEATH OR IN THE SAME "ROOM" AS MY MOUTH spigot: I MEAN ACTUALLY PHYSICALLY IN MY MOUTH AND FACE !!!! IS THAT DOABLE deuce: SOUND OF CRICKETS CHIRPING spigot: PEOPLE

deuce: T NET LET'S UNDRESS EACH OTHER WITH OUR HANDS net: IS THAT EVEN SOMETHING

pants: THE DSM-IV SAYS I WILL NEVER STOP SUCKING COCK (NEVER, EVER) spigot: IS THAT LIKE WICCA

spigot: Q: IS THAT YOU IN THERE WITH THE RADIOS?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK spigot: A: CHONG BONG DONG FONG pants: I'M PG-13 spigot: HOW ARE YOU FIXED FOR PRICKS pants: OKAY R THEN TUMBLING DOWN THE HILL TO NC-17 / X pants: I WAS HOPING FOR DISNEY MONEY spigot: A HUMPTY DUMPTY FILM

pants: SAWDUST !!!!!!!!!!!! I NEED LOTS OF SAWDUST !!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: KITTY LITTER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: TARPS AND BLANKETS AND TOWELS !!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: ANYTHING THAT SOAKS UP LOTS OF PISS FAST !!!!!!!!!!!! pants: PLEASE HURRY !!!!! deuce: SHUT THAT GUY UP

spigot: IS THERE ANY ROOM IN YOUR HEART FOR MY FAT DICK spigot: LET OUT THE HATE AND LET IN THE PISS spigot: PLEASE deuce: SHIT

pants: IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING pants: OH HI deuce: HLLHGAHLAGHLGA

pants: IS THIS HEAVEN pants: AHEM pants: FEELS LIKE HEAVEN pants: NO THIS IS THE BATHROOM pants: YES GET IT ALL OUT pants: LAUGH IT UP YOU BUMS pants: HEY I WAS WILLING TO BE A URINAL BUT NOT A TOILET pants: YOU PEOPLE ARE THE WORST

pants: IS THIS IT THEN pants: WHERE IS THE ROMANCE spigot: HONK

spigot: IS THIS LOVE ??? spigot: I LIKE TO SMOKE DOPE AND WATCH TV spigot: WHEN YOU CRY LIKE THAT IT'S COMPLETELY DISRUPTIVE

pants: DONGS spigot: DONGS pants: DONGS spigot: DONGS spigot: IS THIS MY LIFE pants: DONGS

: Shortcut to CChat : All Programs ⇰ : My Documents : My Recent Documents : My Pictures : My Music : My Computer : Control Panel : Set Program Access and Defaults : Printers and Faxes : Help and Support : Search : Run pants: DONGS spigot: ONGS spigot: MY LIFE pants: DONGS

spigot: OH I'M SORRY IS THIS NOT WHERE WE SHOW OFF OUR BIG FAT FLIPPER DICKS

pants: HAULGUHALG IS THIS UNBIBLICAL BEHAVIOR GHUALGHLBLGUAHBLGAG deuce: WE'LL NEVER KNOW

pants: IS THIS SEAT TAKEN pants: THEY'RE GOING TO MAKE US DO THIS FOR YEARS pants: WE LEARNED NOTHING

pants: IS THIS REAL pants: AM I REALLY HAPPENING pants: IS THIS THE END OF PANTS (FROM JERKCITY)

deuce: MAYBE IF THAT BITCH STARSHA HAD TOLD US THAT ISCANDAR AND GAMILON WERE TWIN PLANETS WE WOULDN'T HAVE KILLED HER SISTER effigy: T DEUCE TRUTH

spigot: I DETECT PLAGIARISM (OR SOME KIND OF ISM WITH A J SOUND) pants: THE BONG ESCAPED !!! I AM CALLING IN THE [NO CARRIER] spigot: I SIMPLY CANNOT WAIT FOR THE HUGE GARLIC FESTIVAL FOLLOWED BY THE ARTICHOKE FESTIVAL FOLLOWED BY THE YOU'RE CHOKING ME FESTIVAL pants: TOO BAD IT OVERLAPS WITH THE [UNINTELLIGIBLE] spigot: TEN THOUSAND MILES TO CASA DE FRUTA?!?!?!?!? STEP ON IT pants: [STATIC]

pants: BANANA SEATS AND SISSY BARS spigot: MY PENIS LOST A MICHELIN STAR

spigot: CHUTES AND LADDERS AND BONERS spigot: HUHHHH HUHHHH IT FEELS SO GOOD JUST TO BE UNFUNNY spigot: I CAN'T TAKE THE PRESSURE

pants: SECURITY

pants: MMMMMMMMMMMMMM deuce: ELECTROCUTED

spigot: PLEASE DO NOT EAT FOOD FROM THE FRIDGE IF IT'S IN A BAG (TAPED) WITH MY NAME ON IT!!! IT IS PROBABLY NOT YOURS!!! ;-) spigot: WHY ARE YOU GRABBING MY HAIR AND BASHING MY HEAD AGAINST THE CORNER OF THE STAIRWELL BANNISTER??? COME ON NOW! spigot: OW OW OW

atandt: SO THEN HE SAYS "DUH IT'S NOT FUNNY" atandt: AND I'M ALL "WHO SAYS A COMIC STRIP HAS TO BE FUNNY" atandt: SO THEN HE STARTS WHINING atandt: I HAD TO SLAP HIS FAT FAG FACE AND ESCORT HIM OUT atandt: AND THE OTHER ONE WOULDN'T FUCKING SHUT UP atandt: SO I HAD TO ESCORT HER OUT TOO atandt: ANYWAY THEY'RE NOT ALLOWED BACK ON THE LOT atandt: HELLO?????? atandt: ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME atandt: OH RIGHT HE SLEEPS LIKE THAT pants: ZZZ atandt: WHATEVER

pants: ALL WIKIPEDIA USERS ARE PEDOPHILES (IT'S TRUE, I READ IT ON WIKIPEDIA)

: SPIGOT THE BEAR IS TAPED BEFORE A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE spigot: THE PUNCH BONE'S CONNECTED TO THE DONG BONE spigot: IT REALLY IS

atandt: WE HOLD THESE TRUTHS TO BE SELF-EVIDENT atandt: THAT ALL MEN ARE CREATED EQUAL pants: BUT NOT THEIR DICKS deuce: PAULI EXCLUSION PRINCIPLE atandt: PAULI'S ALWAYS DID LOOK A BIT PECULIAR

spigot: PRESSING THE FLIPPER ZERO AGAINST MY PENIS

spigot: PANTS SAID I SHOULD CONSIDER BEING A FAG - AND THESE ARE HIS WORDS BY THE WAY - SOMETIMES, NOT ALL OF THE TIME, AND MAYBE SLOWLY PHASING IT OUT COMPLETELY deuce: IT SEEMED HURTFUL SINCE YOU CAN'T CHANGE WHAT YOU ARE spigot: SO NOW YOU CAN SEE WHY I'M IN THE SITUATION ROOM AND NOT SNOOZING OR SLEEPING

spigot: EITHER THIS IS THE JIZZ BUS OR IT ISN'T pants: DING DING spigot: OFER pants: ACTUALLY IT'S MORE OF A SPURT TROLLEY spigot: EITHER WAY I'M STARTING TO THINK I WORE A TIE FOR NOTHING

deuce: GUYS DID YOU TRY FARMVILLE? GOLLY GEE IT'S REALLY FUN

deuce: GLHGAHLAGHLGAHLAG pants: OH YEAH pants: HALGHLAGHLAHGLAHGLAG pants: HOW ABOUT THAT deuce: IT'S SPREADING (GLHAHLGAHLGH) pants: HLAHGLAHGLAHGLUAHG pants: LORD GOD IT WON'T QUIT

pants: don't make me think pants: just do what i ask pants: ow ow ow okay don't do ow exactly what i ask ow ow use common sense ow ow ow it'll grow back ow

deuce: SOMEONE TOOK A SHIT IN YOUR DRINK deuce: ALSO IT'S ALL BUBBLY AROUND THE EDGES SO MANY SOMEBODY PISSED IN IT TOO pants: THESE THINGS HAPPEN (IT'S A BIG CITY)

spigot: WE GOT COUNTDOWNS, WE GOT RED LIGHT GREEN LIGHT, WE GOT GIRLS PANTOMIMING... spigot: ...EXACTLY WHAT BEATOFF STEPS TO PERFORM AND DOWNLOADABLE,... spigot: ...PRINTABLE PDFS TO ELEVATE THE CURRICULUM spigot: I DO NOT WANT ANYONE SAYING THEY LACK INSTRUCTION OR ENTHUSIASM TO... spigot: ...BEAT OFF IN 2017, IT'S A NEW DAY spigot: CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP spigot: I AM NOT CLAPPING I AM SHOUTING AT YOU TO CLAP

pants: DID YOU MEAN 'SLINKY BUBBLE-BUTTED TWINKS'? deuce: DISGUSTING deuce: YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT HOW I LIKE MY TWINKS deuce: QUICK FOLLOWUP: WHAT'S A TWINK pants: IT'S A COFFEE DRINK WHERE YOU ADD ESPRESSO TO A CUP OF HOT WATER

pants: NONESUCH AND POPPYCOCK deuce: BALDERDASH AND ALSO POSSIBLY BANDERSNATCH pants: PISHTOSH AND MISHMASH pants: REDACTED ANAL QUACKERY (IT'S A DONE DEAL)

pants: I AM GOING TO CLICK THE CHINESE FOOD BUTTON

pants: WE'RE GONNA SUCKER PUNCH SO MANY TERFS pants: BAM POW ZAP TAKE THAT "LADY"

dick: IT'S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL / IT'S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL dick: BUT IT STILL WON'T FIT UP MY ASS dick: OH WAIT - THERE IT WENT

deuce: HAHA deuce: I MADE A CAMGIRL CRY deuce: THANK YOU CLARENCE

spigot: SHOULD WE HAVE A DICK RATE THREAD pants: I THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER ASK

deuce: ONRAPEBEGINS, ONRAPECONTINUES, ONRAPEENDS, ONTHROATCUT pants: HANDY deuce: YES IT'S QUITE CONVENIENT

ozone: UP YOURS net: T OZONE MINE OR SOMEONE ELSE'S ozone: I THINK WE CAN GET IT ALL UP YOU IF WE TRY REALLY HARD net: BECAUSE IF YOU MEAN MINE I THINK "DOWN YOURS" IS MORE APPROPRIATE

deuce: IT'S ALMOST LIKE I'M MADE OF GOD

deuce: APPLE BAPPLE I NEED A DICK TRANSPLANT net: I'M A DONOR deuce: LET'S MAKE A DEAL

spigot: it's called wewank and it's a bunch of cubes

pants: IT'S GOT MY HEAD OW OW MAKE IT LET GO OW OW pants: OH GOD OW OW USE AMERICAN CHEESE OW OW pants: MY NECK HAS LONG SINCE BROKEN pants: ALSO I THINK FRIENDSTER IS DOWN pants: ALL I CAN DO TO EXPRESS MY DISPLEASURE IS TWITCH, FOAM pants: ALSO THIS AMERICAN FLAG ONLY HAS 9 STARS pants: WHERE ARE THE OTHER 1,001 deuce: OKAY THIS IS CLEARLY A PSYCHOTIC BREAK

deuce: SHIT JUST DOESN'T HAPPEN ANYMORE IT'S GOT TO BE SOMEONE'S FAULT

pants: GET THIS THING OFF ME deuce: IT'S HEAVY HUH

deuce: I THINK YOU HAVE A PURDY MOUTH spigot: DELETE THIS deuce: SHUT

spigot: it's not easy / licking dick spigot: it is for me but / probably not so much / for you

pants: AH... THE BUM BOAT! THAT'S OUR PLACE! HALUGAHGLAHLGHAG

spigot: "IT'S NOW TIME FOR ME TO PASS 'STAR WARS' TO ON TO A NEW GENERATION OF FLLLRRRRRHHHHHGG," MR. LUCAS SAID IN A STATEMENT. "GLLLLLGGGGG." pants: WILD HORSE BENT HIS WILD HEAD pants: O MY MISTRESS AND WIFE OF MY MASTER pants: I WILL BE YOUR SERVANT FOR THE SAKE OF THE WONDERFUL GRASS

effigy: URINE deuce: DELICIOUS AND BUBBLY deuce: YELLOW AND TRUE pants: SO GLAD IT’S ONLY pants: PEE AND NOT POO

pants: IF IT EVER STOPS RAINING AGAIN LET'S LICK DICK deuce: I DON'T KNOW HOW TO RESPOND TO THAT pants: JUST LICK DICK THEN pants: IT'S ONLY NATURAL

pants: COME AND GET YOUR LOVE deuce: IT'S REALLY STICKY pants: I DON'T NEED YOUR APPROVAL, MOTHER pants: SERIOUSLY COME AND GET YOUR LOVE IT'S RIGHT HERE

spigot: AND DAT'S DAT pants: DUSTS OFF HANDS pants: HANDS IN POCKET pants: WALKS AWAY WHISTLING

pants: forced to give head in the toilet pants: april fool's!!!!!!!! pants: i didn't say stop

spigot: a dong in my mouth spigot: i'm told it's the equivalent of a chest x-ray

pants: I AM A SIMPLE MAN deuce: WELL WE BOTH ARE pants: I SEE A COCK I PUNCH IT (AND THEN FEEL BAD LATER FOR PUNCHING THE COCK) pants: YOU KNOW WHAT pants: WE'VE LIVED RICH, FULL LIVES pants: IT'S TIME TO LIE DOWN IN THE DIRT deuce: YAY

spigot: ALL THOSE IN FAVOR spigot: FOLKS THESE WOMEN NEED ROOMS TO CLEAN AND IF THERE'S NO spigot: EXCUSE ME I HAVE THE FLOOR spigot: THE FIRST ITEM IN THE ARRAY, ITEM ZERO, WILL BE DOGSHIT spigot: HANDS UP WHO KNOWS WHY IT'S CALLED ITEM ZERO spigot: HANDS UP WHO'S HEARD OF ARRAYS spigot: HANDS UP WHO LIKES DOGSHIT spigot: FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER

spigot: EVEN MY DONG BEHAVES DIFFERENTLY IF IT'S BEING OBSERVED deuce: ITS POSITION BECOMES WELL-DEFINED BUT ITS MOMENTUM BECOMES FUZZY (IT SHAKES UNCONTROLLABLY)

spigot: NNNNNGGG I'VE BEEN HACK A DOODLE DOO'D pants: YOUR DUMB GAY FRIENDS ARE HERE FOR YOU pants: WE CAN SEND $$ VIA ITUNES GIFT CARDS pants: DO YOU NEED MY SOCIAL SECURITY # deuce: SHOULD I SHOOT MYSELF IN THE HEAD TO HELP YOU RECOVER YOUR ACCOUNT pants: I THINK WE HAVE TO ASSUME THAT WE ARE DEALING WITH A RUSSIAN AGENT RATHER THAN OUR FRIEND SPIGOT (THE BEAR) deuce: YOU'RE RIGHT (SENDING HIM DICK PIX) pants: :FOOT: :DROOLING_FACE:

atandt: THIS IS A MESSAGE FROM THE JERKCITY EMERGENCY BROADCASTING SYSTEM: atandt: DO NOT MASTURBATE HERE atandt: USE WANKING CHAMBER

pants: GAY deuce: AM NOT

deuce: T SPIGOT YOU SEE RADAR LEFT HIS TEDDY BEAR AT THE CAMP WHEN HE WAS DISCHARGED BECAUSE HE HAD GROWN UP AND DIDN'T NEED IT ANYMORE spigot: SHUT UP

spigot: JUST KIDDING!!!! I STUCK THE TOILET PLUNGER UP MY ASS WHEN I GOT HOME AND I WAS JUST EMBARRASSED THAT IT BROKE OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!

pants: jack **me** off deuce: 010 pants: jack me **off** deuce: 001 pants: **jack** me off deuce: 100

pants: jackoff planet deuce: beatoff aisle spigot: walgreens

spigot: A JAILHOUSE SINGALONG?!?!!? OH BOY spigot: FRERE JACQUES / FRERE JACQUES spigot: JUST THE CHILD MOLESTERS THIS TIME

spigot: IS THAT SO???? WELL HERE'S WHAT I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THAT!!!!!! 10-12 MINUTES FLIPPING AROUND ATTEMPTING TO GET MY REAR-END TOPMOST deuce: I DON'T WANT TO GET OFF ON A RANT HERE BUT [TREMENDOUS, NON-STOP DIARRHEA] pants: CHOPPING OFF HEADS deuce: BEATING OFF INTO JAM JARS, SEALING THEM AS TIME CAPSULES pants: BLESSED BE spigot: TURNS OUT I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

deuce: JAMES WOODS CLEARLY STRAINS TOO MUCH ON THE POT pants: TOO MANY OLIVER STONE MOVIES, NOT ENOUGH GREENS

deuce: WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT THE SUPREME COURT spigot: I'M BEING INDECENT OVER HERE IN THE LADIES' ROOM spigot: DO I SAY THE DONG IS "JAMMING" INTO MY FACE OR JUST "JABBING" spigot: I'M / JUST / WILD / ABOUT / BONERS

spigot: I WOULD HAVE TO DESCRIBE "FOR BETTER OR WORSE" AS HILARIOUS, HEARTWARMING spigot: LIKEWISE GARFIELD AS A TUBBY TABBY WITH CATTITUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: YOU ARE JAMMING THE HOSE INTO MY NOSE

deuce: JANINE LINDEMAGLAGIHGL SHE SHOULD BE SHOT FOR MAKING ME TRY TO PRONOUNCE IT spigot: JANINE USELESS AND OVER THE HILL 5 YEARS AGO, STILL AROUND TO SALVAGE HER CAREER AND HER SHOP-WORN FACE deuce: RIGHT THAT'S HER LAST NAME : neniam sen mia permeso

atandt: YOU KNOW pants: WHAT? pants: OK

deuce: WHO'S GETTING ME WHAT FOR VALENTINE'S DAY PEOPLE pants: I'M GIVING YOU MY JUG OF JANUARY URINE pants: HEARTS AND FLOWERS ??? KITTENS AND HUGS ??? A DOZEN RED ROSES ??? deuce: FAGGOT pants: COCKS AND SOME MANNER OF MEAT BY-PRODUCT THAT HURTS WHEN IT ENTERS YOU ??? deuce: FUCKING : Memo to all: In the future, please do not eat cat food on the set. The smell of the empty cans is disturbing the night crew.

atandt: APPEARS JAVA ISN'T SAVING THE WORLD AS PLANNED spigot: MAYBE SOME SORT OF PISSLET

pants: GRANTING PRIVILEGES TO UNTRUSTED CLASSES ??? atandt: IMPLEMENTING MY OWN SIGNING FACILITY ??? pants: DEPLOYING REAL-WORLD SOFTWARE ON THE INTERNET ???????/ atandt: CARTOONS ABOUT COCKSUCKING AND DICKLICKING ???? pants: NOW YOU'RE TALKING THERE CHIEF atandt: I LIKED YOU BETTER WHEN YOU WERE IN A COMA (A VERY GAY COMA INDEED)

spigot: JAVASCRIPT QUESTION: spigot: HOW DO YOU COUNT THE DICKS IN MY MOUTH